photoless

If it wasn't for the megalomaniacal convictions of eighteen year old television actors, this post would contain photos of the beach, a poolside hangout, Jack in the Box's "ultimate gaming package sweepstakes" poster, and a ridiculously platitudinous teenage house party. (A beer pong table was set up facing the front door, tall drunk blonde girls made out when commanded to by even drunker alpha males, overweight party patrons clung to their attractive and outgoing friends, etc.) Documentation of the aforementioned attracted to me no hassle. It was when I took a candid photo of a crowd on the patio that these kids felt that their privacy had been threatened. "Who took a photo? I don't like photos of me smoking," Sarah Hyland (who has held supporting roles in SVU and the completely negligible comedy series "Lipstick Jungle") yelled at me. I was able to fumble around her verbal attack, not realizing her status and sensitivity as a Z-list celebrity. It was about fifteen minutes later when Sterling Knight approached me and asked to inspect my camera. He seemed sort of baffled when I informed him it was a film camera and therefore could not delete pictures taken with it, and somewhat uneasy when I assured him that no paparazzi magazine would ever get their hands on the photos. Apparently my word was not enough for Mr. Knight, who had my roll of film straight up DESTROYED. The only thing left to do now is to rise to the top of the showbiz world and upstage these two little creepers: